Day 35 | Grow up and let go. I have a memory from when I was 8 or 9. I remember feeling that I worked very hard to prepare a bunch of toys to sell in a garage sale my parents were having. At the end of the morning, the money was equally divided and to this day, I can recall the feeling that I deserved a larger share of the earnings for my contribution. Subsequently, I threw a pathetic temper tantrum which only stopped when I got what I wanted. Thinking back now, that memory is one of the most embarrassing moments I have but truthfully, sometimes I still feel and act like this when I don’t get what I want or feel I deserve. I have two takeaways from this memory I need to consider along my journey. 1) What I want is not always fair and I need to look for balance opposed to me demanding my way. I especially need to deal with these situations like an adult. 2) I need let some memories go. This story may seem silly, but to this day, when I think about it, I get embarrassed and feel a great deal of guilt. I need to let those feeling go and move on with life. I want to be different now so as long as I learn from it, I need to move on. Here are some embarrassing photos of me as a kid. I may look sweet but I had a bratty side for sure!

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Day 25 | Accept and love you for you. What a rollercoaster of a day. It’s mid afternoon and I have felt guilt, I’ve laughed, cried, experienced anger, been jealous, thrived in being super productive and even enjoyed a moment of incredible pride. Not too long ago I would have felt shame and embarrassment for feeling many of these emotions, but not today. For once in my life, I’m accepted who I am. Not as weaknesses but as my strengths. I’m an emotional person who deeply feels. I’m also a wildly analytical and rational human who likes planning and understanding the meaning of everything. I can be serious. I can be goofy. I can be sad and cry but also I can be happy and the life of a party. Sometimes I like to dress up, sometimes I prefer track pants. I love expensive wine and shots of cheap vodka. I am many things, all of which make me, me. Trying to be something I was not only ever held me back. There is nothing wrong with me. All I want now is to continue to explore who I am and learn how to best take advantage of my eclectic nature. God this feels good to say, even better to feel.

Day 25 | Accept and love you for you. What a rollercoaster of a day. It’s mid afternoon and I have felt guilt, I’ve laughed, cried, experienced anger, been jealous, thrived in being super productive and even enjoyed a moment of incredible pride. Not too long ago I would have felt shame and embarrassment for feeling many of these emotions, but not today. For once in my life, I’m accepted who I am. Not as weaknesses but as my strengths. I’m an emotional person who deeply feels. I’m also a wildly analytical and rational human who likes planning and understanding the meaning of everything. I can be serious. I can be goofy. I can be sad and cry but also I can be happy and the life of a party. Sometimes I like to dress up, sometimes I prefer track pants. I love expensive wine and shots of cheap vodka. I am many things, all of which make me, me. Trying to be something I was not only ever held me back. There is nothing wrong with me. All I want now is to continue to explore who I am and learn how to best take advantage of my eclectic nature. God this feels good to say, even better to feel.

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Day 8 | Friends. A day of reflection. I am incredibly grateful for everyone who has reached out to me with their support. I can promise you that there is no need to concern about my posts. However, sometimes in life, it feels like your journey is a lonely one but it’s been proven to me that I am not alone. This has been an important realization. In life, there are good times, bad times and a lot in between. I’ll admit that I have been living through challenging times but I refuse to let life beat me. I have been taking life one day at a time by focusing on making positive change every day. Though this journey, I already have a sense of self and accomplishment that I have not felt in years but know there is still a long road ahead. Knowing that there are people rooting for me pushes me to succeed even more and makes each step a little easier. Thank you.

Day 8 | Friends. A day of reflection. I am incredibly grateful for everyone who has reached out to me with their support. I can promise you that there is no need to concern about my posts. However, sometimes in life, it feels like your journey is a lonely one but it’s been proven to me that I am not alone. This has been an important realization. In life, there are good times, bad times and a lot in between. I’ll admit that I have been living through challenging times but I refuse to let life beat me. I have been taking life one day at a time by focusing on making positive change every day. Though this journey, I already have a sense of self and accomplishment that I have not felt in years but know there is still a long road ahead. Knowing that there are people rooting for me pushes me to succeed even more and makes each step a little easier. Thank you.

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