Day 35 | Grow up and let go. I have a memory from when I was 8 or 9. I remember feeling that I worked very hard to prepare a bunch of toys to sell in a garage sale my parents were having. At the end of the morning, the money was equally divided and to this day, I can recall the feeling that I deserved a larger share of the earnings for my contribution. Subsequently, I threw a pathetic temper tantrum which only stopped when I got what I wanted. Thinking back now, that memory is one of the most embarrassing moments I have but truthfully, sometimes I still feel and act like this when I don’t get what I want or feel I deserve. I have two takeaways from this memory I need to consider along my journey. 1) What I want is not always fair and I need to look for balance opposed to me demanding my way. I especially need to deal with these situations like an adult. 2) I need let some memories go. This story may seem silly, but to this day, when I think about it, I get embarrassed and feel a great deal of guilt. I need to let those feeling go and move on with life. I want to be different now so as long as I learn from it, I need to move on. Here are some embarrassing photos of me as a kid. I may look sweet but I had a bratty side for sure!

Day 35 | Grow up and let go. I have a memory from when I was 8 or 9. I remember feeling that I worked very hard to prepare a bunch of toys to sell in a garage sale my parents were having. At the end of the morning, the money was equally divided and to this day, I can recall the feeling that I deserved a larger share of the earnings for my contribution. Subsequently, I threw a pathetic temper tantrum which only stopped when I got what I wanted. Thinking back now, that memory is one of the most embarrassing moments I have but truthfully, sometimes I still feel and act like this when I don’t get what I want or feel I deserve. I have two takeaways from this memory I need to consider along my journey. 1) What I want is not always fair and I need to look for balance opposed to me demanding my way. I especially need to deal with these situations like an adult. 2) I need let some memories go. This story may seem silly, but to this day, when I think about it, I get embarrassed and feel a great deal of guilt. I need to let those feeling go and move on with life. I want to be different now so as long as I learn from it, I need to move on. Here are some embarrassing photos of me as a kid. I may look sweet but I had a bratty side for sure!

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Day 24 | Know your worth. There seems to be an unexpected consequence when finding happiness, being more confidant in who you are and while learning to love yourself. Not sure I saw this one coming. On the journey to finding myself, I seem to have discovered a new found respect for myself and now have higher expectations from life. When you are lost and feel worthless it’s impossible to realize that you should not settle and should always aspire for more. I can now see that I deserve the things that make me happy and I have the confidence to go get them. No matter how hard it may be. Throwback picture from my sales days.

Day 24 | Know your worth. There seems to be an unexpected consequence when finding happiness, being more confidant in who you are and while learning to love yourself. Not sure I saw this one coming. On the journey to finding myself, I seem to have discovered a new found respect for myself and now have higher expectations from life. When you are lost and feel worthless it’s impossible to realize that you should not settle and should always aspire for more. I can now see that I deserve the things that make me happy and I have the confidence to go get them. No matter how hard it may be. Throwback picture from my sales days.

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Day 19 | Your Health Is Important. From mental health to physical health. Apparently a lot of health related things this week. I’m really happy with the progress of my diet, gym and mental health regiment. My only regret is that I let myself get to a place wheee I needed to work so hard to correct things so from now on I am going to take a more proactive approach to my health. I recently had 25 vials of blood take to run a long list of tests. I got the results today and had a doctor walk me through things. Overall, I thank keto for this, I’m a pretty healthy guy. There are some things to watch closely but nothing that can’t be prevented. I can’t believe I was nervous to get something like this done for so many years. Maybe I was afraid to find out something I did not want to know. Regardless, one more thing off my list that I don’t need to worry about and can proactively monitor to make sure my physical matches the positive mental state I’ve learned.

Day 19 | Your Health Is Important. From mental health to physical health. Apparently a lot of health related things this week. I’m really happy with the progress of my diet, gym and mental health regiment. My only regret is that I let myself get to a place wheee I needed to work so hard to correct things so from now on I am going to take a more proactive approach to my health. I recently had 25 vials of blood take to run a long list of tests. I got the results today and had a doctor walk me through things. Overall, I thank keto for this, I’m a pretty healthy guy. There are some things to watch closely but nothing that can’t be prevented. I can’t believe I was nervous to get something like this done for so many years. Maybe I was afraid to find out something I did not want to know. Regardless, one more thing off my list that I don’t need to worry about and can proactively monitor to make sure my physical matches the positive mental state I’ve learned.

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Day 18 | A day late because I could not quite find the words. I’m still not sure I have. Today is serious topic for me and follows some of my previous reflection. I have long suspected that I may have been living with ADHD my whole life. I am not ashamed of health issues but I have not taken steps to address them either. Over the past few decades, I have seen unbelievable progress towards how mental health issues are perceived and accepted in society. With this in mind, I want to, and need to, be open about my truth. As part of my journey, I have started asking for help when I need it because I can now acknowledge that I can’t fix everything on my own. Recently, I took the step of asking for help from a professional to work through some of my deeper challenges. I am so glad I did. She nearly immediately confirmed my suspicion about ADHD and put me on a plan to work through it. Obviously too soon to say there is a long term difference but I am starting to feel the benefits. I have not been this balanced since… well, maybe ever.

Day 18 | A day late because I could not quite find the words. I’m still not sure I have. Today is serious topic for me and follows some of my previous reflection. I have long suspected that I may have been living with ADHD my whole life. I am not ashamed of health issues but I have not taken steps to address them either. Over the past few decades, I have seen unbelievable progress towards how mental health issues are perceived and accepted in society. With this in mind, I want to, and need to, be open about my truth. As part of my journey, I have started asking for help when I need it because I can now acknowledge that I can’t fix everything on my own. Recently, I took the step of asking for help from a professional to work through some of my deeper challenges. I am so glad I did. She nearly immediately confirmed my suspicion about ADHD and put me on a plan to work through it. Obviously too soon to say there is a long term difference but I am starting to feel the benefits. I have not been this balanced since… well, maybe ever.

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