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Day 35 | Grow up and let go. I have a memory from when I was 8 or 9. I remember feeling that I worked very hard to prepare a bunch of toys to sell in a garage sale my parents were having. At the end of the morning, the money was equally divided and to this day, I can recall the feeling that I deserved a larger share of the earnings for my contribution. Subsequently, I threw a pathetic temper tantrum which only stopped when I got what I wanted. Thinking back now, that memory is one of the most embarrassing moments I have but truthfully, sometimes I still feel and act like this when I don’t get what I want or feel I deserve. I have two takeaways from this memory I need to consider along my journey. 1) What I want is not always fair and I need to look for balance opposed to me demanding my way. I especially need to deal with these situations like an adult. 2) I need let some memories go. This story may seem silly, but to this day, when I think about it, I get embarrassed and feel a great deal of guilt. I need to let those feeling go and move on with life. I want to be different now so as long as I learn from it, I need to move on. Here are some embarrassing photos of me as a kid. I may look sweet but I had a bratty side for sure!

April 6, 2023
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Day 25 | Accept and love you for you. What a rollercoaster of a day. It’s mid afternoon and I have felt guilt, I’ve laughed, cried, experienced anger, been jealous, thrived in being super productive and even enjoyed a moment of incredible pride. Not too long ago I would have felt shame and embarrassment for feeling many of these emotions, but not today. For once in my life, I’m accepted who I am. Not as weaknesses but as my strengths. I’m an emotional person who deeply feels. I’m also a wildly analytical and rational human who likes planning and understanding the meaning of everything. I can be serious. I can be goofy. I can be sad and cry but also I can be happy and the life of a party. Sometimes I like to dress up, sometimes I prefer track pants. I love expensive wine and shots of cheap vodka. I am many things, all of which make me, me. Trying to be something I was not only ever held me back. There is nothing wrong with me. All I want now is to continue to explore who I am and learn how to best take advantage of my eclectic nature. God this feels good to say, even better to feel.

March 27, 2023
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Day 25 | Accept and love you for you. What a rollercoaster of a day. It’s mid afternoon and I have felt guilt, I’ve laughed, cried, experienced anger, been jealous, thrived in being super productive and even enjoyed a moment of incredible pride. Not too long ago I would have felt shame and embarrassment for feeling many of these emotions, but not today. For once in my life, I’m accepted who I am. Not as weaknesses but as my strengths. I’m an emotional person who deeply feels. I’m also a wildly analytical and rational human who likes planning and understanding the meaning of everything. I can be serious. I can be goofy. I can be sad and cry but also I can be happy and the life of a party. Sometimes I like to dress up, sometimes I prefer track pants. I love expensive wine and shots of cheap vodka. I am many things, all of which make me, me. Trying to be something I was not only ever held me back. There is nothing wrong with me. All I want now is to continue to explore who I am and learn how to best take advantage of my eclectic nature. God this feels good to say, even better to feel.

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Day 23 | Loneliness is not always being alone. It’s easy to surround yourself with people to fill time and be a distraction but it is hard to find people you truly connect with that fulfills the human need to be a part of a tribe. I am very grateful for the few with whom I have a true connection, both past and present. Without these people, true loneliness set in and I have to rely on my own company, which has not always been the most positive. As part of my journey, I need to prioritize maintaining the connection I have, rebuilding some I have lost and being open to new people coming into my life. A picture of a time I did not feel alone.

March 25, 2023
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Day 23 | Loneliness is not always being alone. It’s easy to surround yourself with people to fill time and be a distraction but it is hard to find people you truly connect with that fulfills the human need to be a part of a tribe. I am very grateful for the few with whom I have a true connection, both past and present. Without these people, true loneliness set in and I have to rely on my own company, which has not always been the most positive. As part of my journey, I need to prioritize maintaining the connection I have, rebuilding some I have lost and being open to new people coming into my life. A picture of a time I did not feel alone.

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Day 21 | Filling time with positivity and productivity. Came across this on my social media feed the other day and have been thinking about it a lot. I have always believed that having hobbies is a great way to keep focused, not get bored (which I believe is the root of much negativity) and find a sense of accomplishment in life. This list of 5 needed hobbies intrigues me. I don’t want to set myself up to fail by taking on too much but I feel this list can bring some great balance. So here is my list of hobbies. 1) I have a career that makes me money. 2) Between my diet, joining the gym and my love of long walks, I think I’m covered. 3) I’ve started writing again to push my creativity 4) I’m planning on doing some courses as part of my journey to build knowledge and 5) My daily activities and reflections are truly helping me evolve my mindset. Even though it was a random social media post, I feel like this post reinforces many of my plans.

March 23, 2023
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Day 21 | Filling time with positivity and productivity. Came across this on my social media feed the other day and have been thinking about it a lot. I have always believed that having hobbies is a great way to keep focused, not get bored (which I believe is the root of much negativity) and find a sense of accomplishment in life. This list of 5 needed hobbies intrigues me. I don’t want to set myself up to fail by taking on too much but I feel this list can bring some great balance. So here is my list of hobbies. 1) I have a career that makes me money. 2) Between my diet, joining the gym and my love of long walks, I think I’m covered. 3) I’ve started writing again to push my creativity 4) I’m planning on doing some courses as part of my journey to build knowledge and 5) My daily activities and reflections are truly helping me evolve my mindset. Even though it was a random social media post, I feel like this post reinforces many of my plans.

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