April 8 2023 | Instagram

Day 37 | You will fail. I am really trying to be optimistic along this journey but some days are much harder than others. I don’t know a worse feeling than that of failure. There are two types of failure I have come across….

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April 7 2023 | Instagram

Day 36 | Save the drama for your mama! It’s a dumb opening but I could not help myself. I define drama, for the sake of this post, as overly outward reactions or actions to external or internal situations and feelings that negatively impact…

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Day 35 | Grow up and let go. I have a memory from when I was 8 or 9. I remember feeling that I worked very hard to prepare a bunch of toys to sell in a garage sale my parents were having. At the end of the morning, the money was equally divided and to this day, I can recall the feeling that I deserved a larger share of the earnings for my contribution. Subsequently, I threw a pathetic temper tantrum which only stopped when I got what I wanted. Thinking back now, that memory is one of the most embarrassing moments I have but truthfully, sometimes I still feel and act like this when I don’t get what I want or feel I deserve. I have two takeaways from this memory I need to consider along my journey. 1) What I want is not always fair and I need to look for balance opposed to me demanding my way. I especially need to deal with these situations like an adult. 2) I need let some memories go. This story may seem silly, but to this day, when I think about it, I get embarrassed and feel a great deal of guilt. I need to let those feeling go and move on with life. I want to be different now so as long as I learn from it, I need to move on. Here are some embarrassing photos of me as a kid. I may look sweet but I had a bratty side for sure!

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Day 33 | Be respectfully selfish. When choosing to be happy and let the world take me in new and exciting directions, I have found a need to be more selfish when making decisions. Think about what will make me happy and what is important to me. Though I believe this to generally be a good thing, allowing me to live my best life by doing the things that are important to me, I have also learned that it is important to still be conscious of others in my selfishness. Being too selfish and only thinking of yourself, even with the best intentions, will push others away. Once again highlighted is the value of trying to find balance in life.

Day 33 | Be respectfully selfish. When choosing to be happy and let the world take me in new and exciting directions, I have found a need to be more selfish when making decisions. Think about what will make me happy and what is important to me. Though I believe this to generally be a good thing, allowing me to live my best life by doing the things that are important to me, I have also learned that it is important to still be conscious of others in my selfishness. Being too selfish and only thinking of yourself, even with the best intentions, will push others away. Once again highlighted is the value of trying to find balance in life.

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Day 24 | Know your worth. There seems to be an unexpected consequence when finding happiness, being more confidant in who you are and while learning to love yourself. Not sure I saw this one coming. On the journey to finding myself, I seem to have discovered a new found respect for myself and now have higher expectations from life. When you are lost and feel worthless it’s impossible to realize that you should not settle and should always aspire for more. I can now see that I deserve the things that make me happy and I have the confidence to go get them. No matter how hard it may be. Throwback picture from my sales days.

Day 24 | Know your worth. There seems to be an unexpected consequence when finding happiness, being more confidant in who you are and while learning to love yourself. Not sure I saw this one coming. On the journey to finding myself, I seem to have discovered a new found respect for myself and now have higher expectations from life. When you are lost and feel worthless it’s impossible to realize that you should not settle and should always aspire for more. I can now see that I deserve the things that make me happy and I have the confidence to go get them. No matter how hard it may be. Throwback picture from my sales days.

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Day 22 | Don’t be bored actively. I mentioned this yesterday. I feel like boredom is the root of so much negativity. When I historically filled my free time with work, food, binge watching shows and countless hours of video games, I was allowing myself to be actively bored. Just filling time for the sake of killing time. Don’t get me wrong, nine of those activities are bad, and in fact, I think they can be very healthy but the problem is that I was doing them for the wrong reasons. I was using these as distractions. What I’ve realized is that you need to fill your time with things that make you happy, give you a sense of accomplishment or rewards you with a new experience. Don’t just fill your time to avoid being bored. Live. Explore. Learn. Tonight, I choose to live.

Day 22 | Don’t be bored actively. I mentioned this yesterday. I feel like boredom is the root of so much negativity. When I historically filled my free time with work, food, binge watching shows and countless hours of video games, I was allowing myself to be actively bored. Just filling time for the sake of killing time. Don’t get me wrong, nine of those activities are bad, and in fact, I think they can be very healthy but the problem is that I was doing them for the wrong reasons. I was using these as distractions. What I’ve realized is that you need to fill your time with things that make you happy, give you a sense of accomplishment or rewards you with a new experience. Don’t just fill your time to avoid being bored. Live. Explore. Learn. Tonight, I choose to live.

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Day 18 | A day late because I could not quite find the words. I’m still not sure I have. Today is serious topic for me and follows some of my previous reflection. I have long suspected that I may have been living with ADHD my whole life. I am not ashamed of health issues but I have not taken steps to address them either. Over the past few decades, I have seen unbelievable progress towards how mental health issues are perceived and accepted in society. With this in mind, I want to, and need to, be open about my truth. As part of my journey, I have started asking for help when I need it because I can now acknowledge that I can’t fix everything on my own. Recently, I took the step of asking for help from a professional to work through some of my deeper challenges. I am so glad I did. She nearly immediately confirmed my suspicion about ADHD and put me on a plan to work through it. Obviously too soon to say there is a long term difference but I am starting to feel the benefits. I have not been this balanced since… well, maybe ever.

Day 18 | A day late because I could not quite find the words. I’m still not sure I have. Today is serious topic for me and follows some of my previous reflection. I have long suspected that I may have been living with ADHD my whole life. I am not ashamed of health issues but I have not taken steps to address them either. Over the past few decades, I have seen unbelievable progress towards how mental health issues are perceived and accepted in society. With this in mind, I want to, and need to, be open about my truth. As part of my journey, I have started asking for help when I need it because I can now acknowledge that I can’t fix everything on my own. Recently, I took the step of asking for help from a professional to work through some of my deeper challenges. I am so glad I did. She nearly immediately confirmed my suspicion about ADHD and put me on a plan to work through it. Obviously too soon to say there is a long term difference but I am starting to feel the benefits. I have not been this balanced since… well, maybe ever.

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Day 17 | Make the right choice. Today was a hard day. I’m now at a place where I can admit that without it breaking or regressing my progress. The other major difference is that I can recognize when I’m having a hard day and make the choice to change the direction of my thoughts. It sounds easy to simply make a choice to be happy but it’s something I had to learn. I am infinitely grateful that I have found the inner strength to make the right choice. Now, on to happier thoughts and more adventures.

Day 17 | Make the right choice. Today was a hard day. I’m now at a place where I can admit that without it breaking or regressing my progress. The other major difference is that I can recognize when I’m having a hard day and make the choice to change the direction of my thoughts. It sounds easy to simply make a choice to be happy but it’s something I had to learn. I am infinitely grateful that I have found the inner strength to make the right choice. Now, on to happier thoughts and more adventures.

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Day 14 | Writing my future.

Day 14 | Writing my future.

Exciting day! I finally got my reMarkable 2! I am obsessed with writing in notepads. When I got back to Canada I found a huge box of old notebooks dating back to high school. Though I love notebooks, they are not practical with all…

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Day 12 | Since coming back to Canada 7 months ago, i am equally proud and embarrassed to say that I have gone from 240 lbs to 180 lbs thanks to the shockingly enjoyable keto diet and the amazing support and cooking of my wonderful wife. Though feeling more attractive and healthy than I have in years, I have hit a wall in my weight loss and want to be more fit. So, time to join a gym. I hate the gym. I have not actively gone to a gym since I was a teenager, when I was swimming competitively. Time to change that. A month of a personal trainer to get me started. Thanks @learnfitstrength

Day 12 | Since coming back to Canada 7 months ago, i am equally proud and embarrassed to say that I have gone from 240 lbs to 180 lbs thanks to the shockingly enjoyable keto diet and the amazing support and cooking of my wonderful wife. Though feeling more attractive and healthy than I have in years, I have hit a wall in my weight loss and want to be more fit. So, time to join a gym. I hate the gym. I have not actively gone to a gym since I was a teenager, when I was swimming competitively. Time to change that. A month of a personal trainer to get me started. Thanks @learnfitstrength

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