The Baldwin family, like any Hollywood family, became famous because of its seemingly endless well of talent. The four Baldwin brothers have all made names for themselves as actors, comedians, writers, & producers. And though the brothers’ careers would have been enough to keep people interested, the Baldwins and their entourage decided to take their careers in entertainment a step farther. It seems at least once a year, we are treated to our favorite long running series, The Baldwin Family Drama complete with news story after news story of drugs, family feuds, anger management issues, and questionable accents. The Baldwins have made it their mission to save us from slow news days, and we thank them for it!
I’m Scott and today, Scarlett Media is here to celebrate the never ending stream of Baldwin themed breaking news stories, with our list of Top 10 Times the Baldwins Saved Slow News Days. Beat on that like button if you love the craziness and talent this family brings to the world, or cry on the like button if you don’t like them and don’t mind being wrong.
Number ten. Alec Baldwin arrested for punching a man over a parking spot.
Alec Baldwin, eldest and most famous of the Baldwin crew, has become known for his short temper over the years. In 2018, while many nervously awaited US midterm election results, anxieties were quelled, or at least momentarily suppressed, thanks to Alec’s temper. It was reported that Alec had been arrested for punching a man over a parking spot. What made this story even juicier was that SNL, his employer at the time, declined to comment on the incident and Baldwin went so far as to fully deny the allegations via Twitter. Unfortunately for him, and luckily for us, arrest records are public and this wasn’t the first time he’d gotten in trouble for assaulting someone. Alec, we know you’re a bad boy and our prying eyes are grateful.
Number nine. Stephen Baldwin declaring bankruptcy
Given the Baldwin family’s collective wealth, celeb gossip addicts everywhere were delightfully shocked when in 2009 it was reported that Stephen Baldwin had filed for bankruptcy and was allegedly millions of dollars in debt. He had also apparently defaulted on two mortgages. Sensing that bored voyeurs were hungry for even more fun details, the Baldwin Universe gifted people with the added tidbit that a homeless man who had for unknown reasons been allowed to stay at one of the aforementioned properties had been arrested on various drug charges. Adding insult to injury, and the cherry on the top of the story for the rest of us, it was reported that his daughter Hailey now had a higher net worth.
Number eight. Hailey Baldwin Marrying Justin Bieber.
Speaking of Hailey Baldwin, she’s rocked the world of social media and celeb gossip more than once herself. Many were as confused as they were transfixed when it was reported in 2018 that Hailey Baldwin had in fact become Hailey Bieber. That’s right: Hailey Baldwin married Justin Bieber. People everywhere abandoned their work to scour the internet in hopes of understanding how a notorious bachelor with recent problems with drugs, alcohol, and general bad behavior had suddenly settled down. Not to mention Bieber’s on again, off again situation with Selena Gomez. The busybody community was shook and happy about it. Anyone who follows Baldwin drama, however, was not shocked in the least. It made perfect sense that one of the most dramatic Hollywood families would absorb one of the most dramatic pop stars.
Number seven. Online fights about Donald Trump.
The 2020 election cycle was stressful for just about everyone, but the Baldwin brothers and Hailey helped make it a little more entertaining. The family continually trended on social media from 2016 up to the 2020 election due to stark differences in their views about America’s baby in chief. The most fun exchange happened on Twitter between Stephen and Billy where Stephen claimed that if their veteran father were alive he’d be ashamed of media bias by people like Anderson Cooper. Billy quickly came back with “If our father were alive today he’d smack you in the side of the head for supporting Donald Trump.” If only he could come back just for us to see that fight. Some other notable moments include Hailey stating on Instagram in 2018 that her father’s support of Donald Trump had torn the family apart. She would then go on to endorse Biden which nicely complemented her father’s tweet which had snippets like “don’t talk much about family pray 4 everyone” “land of the #free home of the #brave” and “Gospel is truth battle already won #Trump2020.” Poignant. Alec is also vocal about his dislike of Trump, which can be seen beautifully in his portrayal of the decaying Cheeto on SNL.
Number six. Donald Trump rants about Alec Baldwin
Alec Baldwin began portraying Donald Trump on SNL in October of 2016 and viewers could not have been happier. His family’s differing political views ensured that this would lead to juicy online fights. Those who knew of Alec’s own history with aggressive and problematic behavior were certain his portrayal would be perfect. And, most importantly, both were sure to enrage Donald Trump. True to form, Donald took his tantrum to twitter and said Alec Baldwin’s career was dying and mediocre, and was sure to misspell “dying.” And like the mean girl that he is at heart, Donald negged him by saying that Darrell Hammond’s impersonation was better. Though Trump has had no shortage of gossip worthy online tantrums, we have Alec to thank for this one.
Number five. Daniel Baldwin goes to rehab.
Daniel Baldwin is one of the quieter Baldwin brothers, although the bar for that is pretty low. But even he made headlines in 2007 when he announced on the show Primetime that he would be going to rehab and professed his love of cocaine. Shocking no one, he said he began using it in 1989 and described himself as a “diehard coke head.” Not to be outdone by his brothers, he even let the crew of Primetime follow him to rehab. He said that this would be his 9th time in rehab. So far, this was his last trip to rehab. Turns out the 9th time’s the charm. Reportedly, he’s been planning to help others get over drug abuse ever since. We have to applaud both his sobriety and the delightfully theatrical way he announced it.
Number four. Every time Stephen Baldwin was cast on a reality show.
We don’t know whether it was Stephen’s agent or Stephen himself who decided that his success lay in the world of celebrity seasons of reality TV, but boy are we grateful it happened. Being that Stephen comes from a volatile family and has controversial political views, putting him in a house with a group of coastal elites is bound to make for interesting TV and that’s why it is always newsworthy. Stephen has participated in all kinds of shows from Celebrity Mole to Celebrity Big Brother, from I’m A Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here! to…you guessed it….Celebrity Apprentice. His reality TV stints always include something dramatic like severe injury, being quickly booted from the show, or making connections with certain republicans that will provide for even juicier news stories in the years to follow. It’s unclear whether he understands why he’s so compelling to viewers, but one thing’s for sure: anyone thirsty for drama on a boring day will always be ecstatic to see that Stephen Baldwin will appear on another round of Reality TV goodness.
Number three. Alec Baldwin kicked off a flight
The news is full of stories of people getting kicked off of flights these days. Normally it’s something like refusing to wear a mask or going on a racist tirade. But in 2011, drama queen Alec Baldwin was kicked off a flight at LAX for refusing to interrupt a game of Words with Friends when asked to turn his phone off. He then of course posted a lengthy tantrum on twitter where he bashed the airline and sassily promoted other airlines. The tantrum has since been deleted, but that didn’t stop the world from reading every tweet in real time. The good news is, the other passengers’ tweets are still alive, well, and available for the bored masses to google any time they need a fix. On top of that, any time this story comes up it reignites everyone’s obsession with Words with Friends proving that Alec really is the gift that keeps on giving when it comes to slow news days.
Number two. Hilaria’s accent.
In December, a tweet went viral that claimed Alec’s wife Hilaria has been faking a Spanish accent for years. In the days that followed, everyone with internet access and time on their hands became the Sherlock Holmes of cultural appropriation. The world unearthed discrepancy upon discrepancy when it came to Hilaria’s accent as well as her stated heritage. Videos were found where she spoke with a Spanish accent, and just as many were found where she spoke in a clear American accent. Though her birthplace had been listed as Mallorca in multiple bios, the self-appointed Twitter CIA discovered that Hilaria had never explicitly stated that she was from Spain and, because it wasn’t juicy enough already, her own cousin entered the fray to say that her only relationship with Spain was as a vacation spot. The sheer volume high school drama vibes emanating from this scandal manifested Hilaria’s old high school classmates who popped in to say that she was in fact called Hillary, not Hilaria. The world was entertained for days by Hilaria’s hilarious accent.
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Number one. Alec’s leaked voicemail to his daughter.
The crown jewel of the Baldwin Family Drama collection is the infamous leaked voicemail from 2007. During Alec and Kim Basinger’s divorce and ensuing custody struggles, Alec broke and left a voicemail for his then 11-year-old daughter Ireland in which he called her a “rude, thoughtless little pig.” Of course, mental health and verbal abuse are serious issues and anyone suffering from either is encouraged to seek the necessary support. But as far as entertaining celebrity drama goes, it doesn’t get much better than this. Anyone with too much time on their hands was able to listen to the leaked voicemail in its full shame and glory as many times as they wanted. Thankfully, both parties appear to have recovered, with Ireland even poking fun at the incident at Alec’s Comedy Central Roast. The only thing better than celebrity family drama is celebrity family drama followed by public reconciliation. It’s a double dose of entertainment and leaves followers feeling less guilty for their enjoyment of others’ pain. And in this case, the Baldwins were cemented as one of the quickest fixes for boredom – at least, for people who aren’t willing to do drugs and family drama themselves.
Though it’s likely inevitable that we will need to do a second list in the future, let us know if we missed any drama from one of our favorite Hollywood families or if there is another famous family you would like to hear about in the comments below. Thanks for watching.
Writer: Laura Townsend
Editor: AB Scarlett
Voice: Scott | http://bit.ly/3bD679R
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Scarlett.Media productions are for commentary, criticism and parody. All media samples are for transformative and fair use.
See Hosseinzadeh v. Klein, 276 F.Supp.3d 34 (S.D.N.Y. 2017); Equals Three, LLC v. Jukin Media, Inc., 139 F. Supp. 3d 1094 (C.D. Cal. 2015).
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